Mountain of light

I was on a temporary break from writing in my blog and I must say that I missed writing. I enjoy connecting to my inner self as I pour out my thoughts. Sometimes what comes out in these outpourings surprises me and sometimes it leaves me curious. Curious to what lies inside the mind, especially because here I am analyzing other people and here is this whole new self inside me. Maybe this inner self also feeds on the minds of other people and that helps it to grow. As always there is so much to write about, so much to talk and discuss about and so goes the business of blogging.

An issue that has always been close to my heart has been women’s rights. Growing up, I have always been an advocate of equality of sexes, about women getting their fair due from society, about violence against women and sexual repression which ties up with everything else. My current work assignment is with a women’s rights project and it is starting to expose me to the extent of the problem. The problem is that men just refuse to give women their due and let them be whatever it is that they want to be. They like their women as submissive so they can keep them under their thumb and while they are free to do whatever they want to unchecked. This problem has so many faces. One face is marriage and how men like one type of women as their girlfriends and for pre-marital sex and another type for wives. The women who indulge in these activities are perceived to be loose and not fit enough to be taken home to mother. Another face is post marriage when the women is supposed to buckle down and somehow resolve home and office while the man can keep his late hours and keep his career glowing. I am not against women taking care of the house and the man going out to work, but these should be decisions taken and agreed upon jointly and not inflicted by the man onto the woman. There is also the case of how daughters are treated differently than their brothers. While the sons are allowed to go out and pursue their careers and wherever that may take them, daughters are not similarly encouraged. Yes there are exceptions and thank God for those exceptions but then for the majority this holds true.

Yes it is changing and its changing too damn slow. Men I see are finding it increasingly difficult to face up to the new woman. They don’t know how to react, where to look and they certainly don’t see their mothers in these women. Increasingly, women are not finding the right men and vice-versa. It is difficult for men to give the space that women demand of them. They find it uncomfortable (threatened?) when their woman stands up and holds a conversation and has views and opinions independent of them. Women feel that while they have moved on, men are still stuck in a time warp and their image of an ideal woman needs a drastic revamp. Its a classic mismatch and the only way forward is for the men to change. The men haven’t changed for quite some time now and they certainly haven’t changed for the women.

So why am I saying all this? Personally, some wonderful women that I know and have known have enriched my life. They have added to my thought process, broadened my horizons and have made me a much better person. It is not about control, it is about giving and getting so much more in return. It doesn’t suit anybody for men to continue to dominate women. By continuing with this domination, 50% of the society will never be able to come up to its full potential. I think if we start giving women the space and respect that they deserve in society, we will start cutting off the roots of a lot of problems. Problems like rape, sexual discrimination, eve teasing, female infanticide etc. have their genesis in the respect and space a society accords to its women.

And let’s start with the man in the mirror...